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When people hear that I’m a professional matchmaker they are always amazed at finding out HOW I got started.

I mean, many of us have played Cupid at least one time in our lives, right? But how did that work out? Is the couple living their “happily ever after” with your introduction?

I’m happy to say that the majority of my introductions have become marriages, with children, and many have lived blissful (aside from normal marriage stuff) lives. I seem to have a knack for doing this and that is why people seek my help.

But, I am sure you want to know HOW I do it?

Actually, I’d prefer to say how it shouldn’t be done.

It shouldn’t be done with a high-pressure salesperson. It shouldn’t be done with someone sitting in a small, dark room with you, spending 30-60 minutes with you, asking you very basic questions of what your hobbies are. It shouldn’t be done by a firm that has quotas to make, or people who NEED to go out on the quotient of dates promised when the other poor souls signed up.

It should be done in a soft, helpful way with someone who wants to spend time with you-get to know you and see if YOU are also a fit for their brand. The reason this is so important is because this person also needs to get to know you, deeply-and you should be able to trust this person with some very dark secrets. The matchmaker you hire should have a success record, be able to provide references for you to call and chat with, and not hide anything. Concrete numbers, as this is a business…..and be open, honest and forthright with their business. After all, this is not only a business arrangement but its also an emotional investment.

Other important key factors are making sure that you have the tools to start dating. My business model involves a relationship coach who can pinpoint your fears and help you get past those roadblocks. If you are carrying emotional baggage so severe, you are not yet ready to date and will sadly be wasting your time and resources.

A professional matchmaker who spends the time in getting to know YOU-what makes you tick, and helps you with your challenges may be the best fit. It doesn’t have to cost a fortune, but it will clearly be more expensive than dating apps. And we all know how those go. The value of your time is priceless and you need to choose how to best spend that valuable resource.

Lori Mendelsohn

Lori Mendelsohn is a matchmaker in the Milwaukee area. Her business is www.smartfunnysingle and she has over a dozen marriages under her belt with one engagement pending. She uses her intuition and knowledge of the human condition to match singles.