How much should we expect of our children with regard to self-care and contribution to the family as a toddler, as a young child, as a teenager, and as an adult? This is an ongoing dilemma for most all parents beginning as early as post-infancy and continuing on through adulthood. It is the basis for […]
Category: The Purposeful Parent
Parenting can be hard, but it doesn’t have to be if you are Purposeful Parent. Racine County Eye is proud to partner with Kate Martin, an educator, and author of the column The Purposeful Parent.
MartinÂ has been a high school teacher for 27 years andÂ retired from theÂ Racine Unified School DistrictÂ in 2015.
She taught students with special needs as well as those in general education. While working with hundreds of parents over the years, she discovered that there was a significant lack of resources and educational opportunities to help them navigate the many demands of parenting today.Â For this reason, in 2013 she founded The Purposeful Parent, offering workshops and resources for parents, teachers, and caregivers.
Martin’s column comes out on Wednesdays every week. She’ll also be doing a monthly podcast. She’ll offer up her best advice as well. So if you have questions, feel free to email her atÂ firstname.lastname@example.org.
The Purposeful Parent: Hocus Pocus—They Flipped the Focus
Sometimes children and adults use manipulative strategies to avoid responsibility. Today we are introducing one such trick which uses ‘slight of mind’ to quickly switch the focus off of one person and on to another. We refer to this mental magic trick as ‘Flipping the Mirror.’ When a person is confronted with changing a behavior, […]
The Purposeful Parent: Psychologically Based Myth Busting for Parents
Myth #3— Parents should reward children for good behavior. False. Punishment and rewards are simply opposite sides of the same coin. Both are forms of manipulation and both are responsible for teaching children that control lies somewhere outside of us rather than within. —Much like punishment, rewards can give the appearance of changing behavior for […]
Purposeful Parent: Psychological Based Myth Busting For Parents #2
Today we present the 2nd myth in the series entitled ‘Psychologically based myth busting for parents!’ Myth #2— Punishment is necessary to make children behave. False. Punishment is quite simply ineffective and counter productive. It can have life-long damaging effects and ironically is often responsible for promoting and creating the very behaviors we hope to avoid […]
The Purposeful Parent: Psychological Myth Busting for Parents
It ain’t what you don’t know that gets you into trouble. It’s what you know for sure that just ain’t so. Mark Twain For the next few weeks, the Purposeful Parent will be offering some insight into the inaccuracy of some of the most prevalent long-held beliefs about parenting and discipline — otherwise known as […]
The Purposeful Parent: That Parent in the Mirror
In what ways might I as a parent, be allowing, promoting or creating this situation? I wonder how different my experience as a teacher and parent would have been had I not learned of this dynamic self-reflective question. It was first introduced to me by my mentor, Dr. Frank Alessi, fifteen years ago during a […]
The Purposeful Parent: A Graveyard for Staplers
Teachers, I turn to you for validation— teenagers are destroyers of property! Am I right? Nothing is safe within the teen-zone. Whether in the classroom or the home, anything from a pencil to a couch, anything they can pick up or jump on is open game. If they can break it, smash it, tear it, […]
The Purposeful Parent: I’m listening
What do the results of questionnaires and polls administered to teens over the past 50 years reveal regarding what they most want from adults? You might be surprised to learn that what they most desire is simply to have a caring adult… listen. Yes, believe it or not, they crave to have an audience with […]
The Purposeful Parent: Why Don’t You Just Ask Me?
Let’s begin with a fun quiz for Purposeful Parents! In which hand does the statue of liberty hold the torch?On a standard stop light, is green on the top or bottom?On which side of an open book are the even-numbered pages, left or right?In what direction does water drain in your bathroom; clockwise or counterclockwise?Grumpy, […]
Do you seek obedience or commitment from your children?
File photo from Flickr Very often parents come to me with a request for assistance after their child has, in their words, ‘disobeyed’ them. I know what they want from me. Most of those who work with children are forever in search of the same holy grail. They want the consequence of all consequences— the […]
How to honor your children’s thoughts and feelings.
Sitting in the coffee shop is my favorite place to observe parenting at its best and sometimes not so best. I just overheard the following from a caring and loving group as they addressed their two-and 1/2 year-old child. Grandpa: Now you’re not going to cry again when you come with us are you? Grandma: […]
Parenting teens? Sometimes you need to get creative
Parenting teens can be frustrating. But it doesn’t have to be. As we close the month of blogging about teens, I am compelled to address something that for me can best be described as irksome! (Caution: rant ahead) Over the past 20 years, I have trained in dozens of schools and organizations that serve teenagers […]
Are you smarter than a 9th grader?
“Are you smarter than a 5th-grader?” I’ve always enjoyed that television show. It’s so amazing to watch those little kiddos spew out information on such a wide variety of subjects. As an educator, I’ve spent quite a bit of time researching cognitive development in children. The average healthy 10 to 11 year old is quite […]
The Purposeful Parent: First Response to Teen Depression
“I think my 17-year-old is depressed!” What is your first response? Many parents have been conditioned to believe that medication is our first line of support. So, when we learn that our child might be suffering from depression, we are compelled to call the family doctor, make an appointment, and do our best to get […]
Parenting can be a SPOOKY process
What do you find most SPOOKY about parenting? The Purposeful Parent thought this might be the perfect season to find out what parents feel is most spooky about raising children. Now, we’re not talking literally, as in really creeped out … or maybe we are! Sometimes it may feel like we are indeed living with […]