Coming from someone who doesn’t follow her own advice….it should be no longer than 1.5 hours.
Why? (or why don’t I follow my own advice?)
Because if you are spending more time together, and the date is going so well, you start spilling the beans. And the idea of a first date, so to speak, should be, as they say in the dog world, a scratch and sniff! When you start spending more time together, you start telling way too much and that can be a deal breaker for a second date. (TMI can have some severe consequences and can be a HUGE turnoff!)
3 tips for a first date:
Meet somewhere for an adult drink of coffee. That way, if you need to bail, it’s not a major time commitment and you don’t even need to hire a dog walker for the shorty date you’ll be on.
- Ask a lot of questions and see if they are also asking questions about you. No point in staying more than an hour if the person sitting across from you is doing nonstop talking about themselves. Boooooorrrriiiinnngggg!
- If it’s going well, plan another one right then and there. The idea of a first date is to see if there is anything in common or if you want a second one. It’s perfectly okay to say you really enjoyed the time you spent with them, and you can’t wait for another one. People love praise, to be acknowledged and thanked for their time.
Pour it on if you like the other person. If you don’t want to see them again, thank them and tell them it was a pleasure to meet them. Nothing more.
I realize first dates can be nerve-wracking and no one really wants to go on them. However, if you don’t play, you can’t win. Go ahead, have fun and make it a learning opportunity!
Lori Mendelsohn is a professional matchmaker. With a knack for introducing people who wind up saying, “I do,” she can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org. Her website is www.smartfunnysingle.com