In my daily activities interviewing potential clients, I get to hear about their dating stories. And with each story, I’ve come to realize that just about everyone has the same things to say. All of the singles find that people fall into four categories. I’d like to share them with you!
- The Gold-digger. This is prevalent for both men and women. People are looking for either a nurse or a purse (the nurse of course refers to those who are up in years, not younger singles) and want people with enough financial stability to support them if they were to become emotionally and physically involved with them. While most people are hopefully self supporting, there are many who seek that stability with others. Beware.
- The Clinger. This person is immediately in love with you, asks for an inordinate amount of time to be spent with you, texts incessantly and decides within 1-2 dates that you are “the one” without truly getting to know you. This person’s character deficiency of being afraid to be alone is a big red flag, and should be avoided, or, at the very least, discussed if you feel there may be a future. I’ve always said that you can’t be with someone else until you can be alone and happy with yourself.
- The Serial Dater. This person dates a ton of people without ever committing to one particular person. While this is fine for some, if you are on the paying end of this, it could get very frustrating for you if there isn’t an end game. It’s important to discuss a potential expectation within the first few dates with someone who you feel you may wish to get to know better. If you find yourself frustrated that things are not going as you wish, time to have a frank heart to heart about what the other person is feeling.
- The Topper. This person has to top everything you say. Your experiences always pale in comparison to theirs-they are always better-smarter-more worldly-more traveled-more experienced in just about everything. This can create some serious issues if the person always has to be better. To me, this shows that the person is insecure about who they are. Wouldn’t it be better if they said to a potential paramour….for example….”I’ve been to Tahiti, too-what was your favorite memory?
My best advice is to always talk about how you are feeling. Many times, people have no clue on how they are coming across to another person, and perhaps, with a bit of coaching, a great potential relationship is waiting in the wings. A fine-tuning serves both people well, and can clear the air.
Lori Mendelsohn is a local resident. She purposefully connects people both personally and professionally through her company SmartFunnySingle. Her intuitive skills guide her to introductions and that has resulted in many marriages. Nothing makes her happier using her true purpose in life.
If you have dating and relationship advice, feel free to email her at firstname.lastname@example.org. She is currently recruiting singles who wish to date amazing clients for dating leading to long-term relationships.